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Like I care what you think....
Thursday Morning:
5:30 AM - Rolled out to The Blue Meanie (My nigh-indestructible '84 Ford Escort). Went to gas up and get a Vanilla Frappucino for the morning, but all I had was $100 bills, and had to wait until the gas jockey could break the c-note. Filled the tank finally and headed up to pick up my roommates.
6:45 AM - Finally rolled into Norm's to pick up Christa (from WUT) and Mandy.
7:30 AM - After a decent sized breakfast, we load up The Meanie, drop off Christa's car, and hit the road.
8:30 AM - The Meanie actually makes it over the mountains out of the valley. Those in the heavens are obviously watching over us... or are they?
9:30-10 AM - We pull into Bakersfield for gas and to rest the Meanie from the mountain ranges. When in the gas station, we peruse a map and realize we were never supposed to be in Bakersfield and have navigated our way to the 99 Freeway instead of staying on the 5. The navigator (Christa) for the trip also missed this due to falling asleep repeatedly. Meanwhile, Mandy falls asleep as soon as the car moves, and doesn't even make it to the freeway from Bakersfield without dozing off.
1 PM - Stopped for lunch at a Red Robin in Central Cali. We decry the lack of AC in the Blue Meanie and rejoice over the cold air in the restaraunt and endless sodas.
4 PM - Pull finally into the city of San Jose. According to Mapquest's directions, we should be within a mile from the hotel.... We ain't.
4PM - 5PM - Continually drive around downtown San Jose, attempting to decipher Mapquest's directions, which seem to tell us to drive around in a circle. Eventually, I call Mark Tomaino to get the Doubletree phone number, and call the hotel for proper directions.
5PM - Finally pull into the Doubletree Hotel. Attempt to check in, but the hotel has lost my reservation. Again call Mark, whom tells me to take one of his extra rooms, (which eventually turns out to be the same room number that I was initially to get. I run into Richard in the lobby and cast several aspersions upon his ancestry when I find out he only had a 15 minute drive to the Hotel. After loading all our luggage into our room, I go into the lobby and go hang in the lobby with Richard, Zola, Jesus/Lila, Sonja, Sera, and others. I admire the ultra swanky Con t-shirts and resolve to buy one before the end of the weekend.
Evening - Thursday - After freshening up, making sure my final roommate for the night is able to get her belongings to the now Arctic temperature room, we all go down to the 2nd floor and commence with the partying. I whore out my religious calling by conducting a variety of random weddings. I reunite the H!L!A! Spice (Didn't we determine that Spice was the plural of spouse?) of Sonja, Sera, Kelly, and Sylvia. The fifth spouse whom nobody could remember the name of for months wasn't there to renew her vows. I start Lu (from FVE) on her road for 69 husbands while I'm at it. After much drinking and frivolity, the denizens of 473 creep up to the room to catch some shut-eye around 3 in the morning.
Morning - Friday - I wake up at around 9:30 AM. The room is darker than a republican's heart, so I make my way to the balcony to read "A Midwinter's Tale" and give myself a bit of cancer. After a while, seeing my roomates are still sleeping away, I make my way down to the lobby, so to not disturb their slumber. I meet up with the lobby folk yet again. I remind Bernie that one day I will someday make him tap like a bitch. =)
Afternoon - Friday - After realizing I underpacked, I make a run to Men's Wherehouse to pick up some final clothes for Friday night. I show up to registration to get my pass and a bad pic taken of me. I make it back to my room to change, and learn that eyelash glue isn't the end-all savior I was led to believe.
Friday Evening - Convention Night #1 - After suiting up in my room, I make my way down to the convention hall. I try vainly to lose my chips at Blackjack, but am unsuccessful for quite a bit of time. Finally I hit a losing streak and start dropping chips like a bag of Ruffles with a hole in them (Ok. Its a bad metaphor) I spend some time hanging out with Marilynn from Sins before my ears begin shrieking at me to get away from the speakers. I split the rest of the time hanging in the lobby with various Con drifters and hanging outside in the clouds o' smoke.
<Random Note- Best Gangster Outfit - Ed Reed as Gangster/Bounty Hunter Boba Fett. We've now seen Ed as a Stormtrooper and Fett, so I'd not be surprised to see Darth Vader in Las Vegas>
Friday Late Night - 2nd Floor Patio - Its RockyRave2K! The patio was resplendant in glow stiz, techno, and bits o' jungle. The area around the chairs start up a game of "Kiss Me" The rules are as followed.
You say "Kiss me, <name>"
<Name> kisses you.
Everybody seemed to have a decent success rate at this lil' experience. 'Twas also useful for getting people to go away if you so wished. =)
After some extracurricular activity in my hotel room had ceased, I was finally able to grab some shuteye.
Saturday is mostly a blur. Let's see what I remember...
Woke up sometime in the midday, went to lunch with some various peeps, and began drinking. =)
Right before the Saturday festivities began, I ran up to my room and got suited up. On my way back down, I got accused of being hotel staff on at least three occasions.
Went into the convention hall, grabbed a free seat behind Ed's art up for auction, and decided to shill that for a bit. (BTW, if you want to see more of Ed's art, check out the links section of my webpage. The URL is in the .sig)
I entered the costume contest as Trixie. Why? Why not? I didn't win, duh. When you have a naked, painted black Sonja as competition... Well, you don't terribly expect to win. I did, however, make $2 to keep my clothes on. I donated that to my fellow competitors.
I then entered the Gong Show, expecting to be gonged. I actually lasted longer than I thought. Twas fun to suck, truly it was, and I made everybody else look better.
Here's my view on The Gong Show participants:
"A Whole Nude World"- Boobies are good.
"New Rocky Outlaws" - Would've been much cooler if they'd ran in when I was starting my bit, and they accidentally played the music. Maybe next time. =) Otherwise, nice bump, Bernie.
"Everything Reminds Me of My Therapist" - Like I said, its good to suck, sometimes. =)
"Olympic Toothbrushing Team" - Ahhhhh... A classic sacrifice. I'm gonna have to use that sometimes.
"Spice Trixies" - Did I mention boobies are good? And how FRICKIN' amazing is it that Sonja made the transition from painted all black to Posh Spice.
"Song for Kat"- Buy Anthony's CD. It rules. Despite the goodness of boobies, I believe this should've won, if only for Carole running like a scared rabbit and being replaced by Dame Edna/Sal.
I won a raffle prize. Amazing. Twice in 5 years. =)
Next was the Special Performances.
Unfortunately, I missed The Bawdy Caste, Quad, and most of WUT's shows, so I can't really say much of anything about them.
However, from what I did see....
Frank's Virgin Ears "Theater Fags" - Any performance that uses Rent rules. Any performance that uses David Bowie rules more. 3 guesses on what my opinions were.
Barely Legal "ICP Dating Game" - This also ruled. The characterization was awesome for this. Too bad Jared had to sacrifice a beer during the show. =)
Midnight Insanity "Dueling Franks" - I'm biased. However,this was the best performance of DF I'd ever seen, and I've seen them all.
Sins o' The Flesh "Tim Burton's RHPS" - Great googly moogly, this was phenomenal. Great show, kids.
I missed the movie, Its not like I've never seen it before.
Afterwards, I ATTEMPTED to party, but the Gestapo attacked and forced everybody indoors. AND WHO THE HELL IS JAY DHABI?! After partying indoors, went back to my room, until new extracuricular activities finally forced me out.I spent the rest of the night/morning hanging in the lobby.
On Sunday, I drove the length of the 101 home. End of story.
The following people from the convention ruled:
Kelly McKivor - Within 10 minutes of seeing Kelly, I get a neck rub. Dammit, now its official. Kelly's ass is great and all, but I'm basing a religion on Kelly's hands, dammit. Wayne ain't too shabby himself.
Jason from Sins - You're a rat bastard, Jason (you know why. =)) yet a cool guy, so I forgive you.
Lila/Jesus, Sylvia, Sera, and Joey/Blake/Bloey - You folks are always great fun to hang out with. See y'all in Vegas.
Marilynn from Sins - Thanks for the shirt!
Richard - Still gonna beat your ass. Still gonna take your jersey.
Ed - I've got money on you being Vader in October. =)
Bernie - Still gonna make you tap. =)
Sonja - Tolja nudity was good. =)
Jay Dhabi - WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
The Staff of BA2K - Congrats on one of the best cons, I've ever gone too.
Anybody I forget, I'll make up for it later.